According to Highsnobiety.com, the Karl Lagerfeld Teddy Bear by Steiff, will be released in September at Neiman Marcus in New York and will go for above $1400 each. Who wants to buy me one?
Montauk Monster Update July 31, 2008
Someone created an entire blog devoted to capturing the beast. Literally, the blog is called “capture the beast” and offers up hypotheses for the beast’s origins:
1) the Montauk Monster is a sleestak from Land of the Lost.
2) The Montauk Monster is the skeksis from Dark Crystal.
While I don’t agree with either hypothesis, I do appreciate the reference to Land of the Lost. The site also has a useful poll about where the monster will surface next and a thorough examination of the monster-hunter.
Best of all, I love the blog’s graphics. Someone is quite handy with photoshop…
Image from: http://capturethebeast.blogspot.com/
Ok, I really need to post about something that’s been plaguing me for the past two days. First, Gawker posted this fucking insane story and picture about an alleged monster that washed up onto the shore of Montauk recently. Some people thought it was a dog, others hypothesized that it was a shell-less sea turtle and still others thought it was a viral-marketing stunt. Then Gawker published this follow-up article and NY Mag jumped on the bandwagon with an article of its own, ruling out the possibility of a Cartoon Network marketing stunt, and in fact scrounging up eyewitnesses of the “monster”:
” A number of eyewitnesses say they saw the monster with their own eyes. “I saw the monster,” says Michael Meehan, a 22-year-old waiter at the Surfside Inn, which sits above the beach where the monster washed up. “I just came walking down the beach and everyone was looking at it. No one knew what it was. It kind of looked like a dog, but it had this crazy-looking beak. I mean, I would freak out if something like that popped up next to me in the water….”This woman kept calling animal control,” said Meehan. “She wanted to name it after herself. I think they came and got it. The carcass. Whatever it was.”” – Nymag.com
Even Plum TV has gotten involved (ah Plum tv, I tried to get myself filmed by your camera man at a party last weekend, and you ignored me), publishing this article, which doesn’t really say anything we don’t already know. Thought they did contact “four government biologists” who “unable to identify the species of the animal from its photo and came to the conclusion that ‘no such creature exists'”. Marci Caplis of the U.S. Fish and Wildlife Service noted that rare and unknown sea animals did surface after the Asian tsunami, and although the recent East Coast storms are not of comparable magnitude, the animal did wash up on a particularly stormy day in the Hamptons. Others have speculated that the animal escaped from Plum Island Animal Disease Center. The photographer, Jenna Hewitt of Montauk, and two companions who also saw the animal, will appear this Friday on “The Juice” on Plum TV.
Now even Fox News – sigh – has jumped on board, having its oh-so-knowledgeable Jeff Corwin weigh in on the controversy. I just wish the Fox News people would go back to reading Highlights magazine and stop trying to comment on important issues.
Anyway, enough about their opinions. What do you think? I think:
- It’s not a dead dog (sad)
- It’s not a shell-less turtle
- It’s not a viral marketing stunt
- I’m not going to go swimming at the beach this weekend
Paging Darwin <Plum TV>
Montauk Monster Madness Spreads <Gawker>
Those of you who know me probably know that I don’t like cats very much. In general I find them to be boring, bitchy and smelly (except for Yoyo, who fucks shit up). Anyway, the news this morning brought my attention to Princess Chunk, a 44-pound cat, found wandering in Voorhees, NJ without a collar. This week Princess Chunk is doing a press tour of sorts all around NYC to raise awareness for the Camden County animal shelter. According to this article on Gothamist, the shelter believes Princess Chunk is healthy, but the cat will have bloodwork done on Monday. A vet says Princess Chunk “may suffer from a genetic predisposition to obesity, a poor diet or other underlying medical factors.” The average cat is closer to 10-12 pounds.
Forging on in the Quest for Magic Berries July 18, 2008
As I have compulsively covered on this blog, my personal quest to acquire magic berries has been a long and arduous journey, one that sadly, is yet to come to a happy, flavor-tripping end. I’ve been waiting, and waiting, and waiting…but still no berries. NO FUCKING BERRIES! I wrote to Neel Shah…he wrote back that the berries would come in two weeks. Two weeks passed and still no berries. I wrote again to Neel…no response. I scoured the internet and found this useful article on NYmag.com, where others expressed their anger/sadness/disappointment at Miracle Connect and I was relieved to learn that I’m not alone!
After further research, I discovered that some have manufactured magic berries into tablet form, which are convenient as they do not go bad (but they dissolve on your tongue in the same way as the berries). Turning my attention to Miracle Fruit World, I was excited to see that although the operation runs out of England, it seems to be legit. They even offer refunds! And they have pictures. I checked out their ebay feedback and it seemed to be entirely positive, so I decided to place an order for ten tablets. Below is a picture from Miracle Fruit World’s website. I mean the pictures look totally normal…right? The Asian writing and phrase “mysterious fruit tablets” just made me want to buy them more. Because who knows if I’ll die when I eat one of the tablets or not. A person from Miracle Fruit world told me they should arrive in 7-10 days…I’m holding my breath.
(Image from Miracle Fruit World.com)
Where for art thou magic berries? July 8, 2008
In previous posts, I have chronicled my wait for magic berries and then subsequent happiness at Neel Shah from Radar’s response, – a response which made me think that my dream of a flavor tripping experiment would actually one day soon come true. But alas, the berries have not come, and I am left alone and sad, wondering if all of my excitement and planning for the flavor tripping experiment was in vain. Below is the updated, disappointing truth:
Days since ordered berries: 32
Days since Neel Shah emailed me saying berries would arrive in 2 weeks: 18
Lie on Miracle Connect’s Website: “So our berries get to you fresh, we ship all orders overnight. For those in NYC, we can arrange a convenient dropoff. All orders should be placed on or before Wednesday noon EST. They will arrive Friday of the same week.“
Naked Cowboy Suing M&M’s June 25, 2008
(Image from Littleviews.com)
Working in Times Square (unfortunately) puts me in close contact with the infamous Naked Cowboy almost every day. For those of you who don’t know, for the past ten years, Robert Burck (who calls himself the naked cowboy) plays the guitar while dressed only in white cowboy boots, a hat and skimpy white underwear in Times Square. One day he wasn’t very busy – I think it was overcast or something – and I was stuck at that particular light where he stands waiting to cross the street, so I decided to ask the Naked Cowboy some burning questions that I’d been grappling with for some time. Below, I will share with you the juicy tidbits I learned from our conversation.
- The Naked Cowboy does not wear the same pair of tighty-whities every day. Rather, he has many pairs, all with the words “Naked Cowboy” written in capital letters on the ass. Though he has several pairs, he washes his underwear on a regular basis to keep them looking pristine, crisp and bright.
- The Naked Cowboy sticks to a strict workout regime to keep his body toned though admittedly, i have seen him in the deli eating a bag of chips.
- The Naked Cowboy is a shrewd businessman: he charges tourists $5 to take a picture with him, and makes bank every day. In fact, he claims to have so much money that he has his very own brand-new Cadillac Escalade. He also told me that he has saved a great deal of money and it is earning interest in the bank.
- When the Naked Cowboy needs to use a bathroom during the day (which happens from time to time – he is only human, after all), he walks into nearby hotels such as the Marriott Marquis to use their lobby bathrooms.
- The Naked Cowboy has a managerial type sidekick who hands out promotional flyers to bystanders and tourists. He also sometimes films the Naked Cowboy with a hand-held camera.
And that is what I know about the Naked Cowboy in a nutshell. So naturally I was interested to read on Reuters today that the Naked Cowboy will be allowed to move forward with the $6 million lawsuit he filed in February over video billboards depicting a blue M&M dressed in his signature outfit.
Other reading: http://www.littleviews.com/home/newyork/naked_cowboy.cfm