Last week, before this blog existed, I wrote a guest post on my friend Phil’s blog about dating. Lauren really liked it and told me I should put it up on here, so because she’s older (23!) and wiser (mere weeks away from her M.A.) than me, I’ve decided to listen to her.
We are all aware that technology has crept into every crevice of modern life. Sometimes though, I think we forget just how important it is. For instance, today I found myself posing the question, “should I even bother to pursue things with a guy with no cell phone?” Ten years ago, that would not have been an issue, let alone a legitimate problem. Today, a person’s technie situation is both legitimate and vital to the dating process.
Typical scenario: girl meets guy at bar. What next? Well, in 2008: girl gives guy her cell number; guy sends witty text, girl stalks guy on facebook, witty texts turn into flirty texts and maybe a phone call, then a date. Is this reliance on technology good? Maybe so, maybe not. Having a cell phone allows the daters to have some freedom- texting is a great way to break into conversation without the awkward pauses, and personal numbers avoid having to go through roommates or parents. But there are bad, very bad, things that go along with having cell phones. Drunk dialing/texting is the leading cause of premature breakups.* Predictive text is as evil as it is convenient, especially if your cell is like mine and predicts “boning” instead of “coming”. And cameraphones are good for nothing. It is one thing to be silly, drunk and horny. It is another to have a topless pic of me circulating via text.
It is basically a toss-up with computers/the internet as well. Gchatting/instant messaging has all the benefits of texting, but without the annoying slang, and is easier to get away with at work and be successful at if you have fat fingers. Facebook is where it gets tricky. I like that I can check your profile to make sure you don’t have “killin dem hoes” as an interest. It saves me time, and possible injury. Checking out pics of the ex’s new fug girlfriend is fun too. However, getting messages in response to my change in relationship status is annoying, and makes me feels like poo. Oh, and please don’t judge me by that picture taken at 11pm on St. Patrick’s Day, though I will judge you on how many application requests you send me.
So back to my original question: are we so reliant on technology that it’s become difficult to even date without it? In my humble opinion, yes. Whether it is good or bad, the technological component of dating has become ingrained in the culture, and taking it out forces a re-structuring of the process- which is doable, but yes, effing difficult. More difficult than dating a techie, because at least a techie can fix your broken printer and buy you cool gifts.
*Not an actual statistic.